Hello Friends,
As I mentioned in my last blog, we are in fact moving to Houston, TX. At the most recent appointment in April, the doctors confirmed the state of Kemarah's sick heart and agreed that the only way to "heal" her would be to give her a new heart. After coming to grips with the fact that this is no cure at all, simply a new set of symptoms that will require new medications and a new way of life for those of us closest to her, I have become almost excited that we are finally moving forward with something. After more than a year of uncertainty, fear, anxiety, and many, many questions, I feel like we finally have some kind of solid answers. Although living with a transplanted organ will be a challenge, it will make my baby feel better, and for all intents and purposes she will be "normal" and able to do all the things a healthy little girl should be able to do.
I feel as though 2011 was the year that God felt I needed to learn just about every life lesson there is, and now, as we dive full-speed into 2012, I find myself challenged, once again, on very different levels. We will be moving to Houston in June. Kenya will (hopefully) be working full-time while we are there and I will be staying home with my 2 wonderful children. This in and of itself is a challenging concept for me to grasp. I have had a job since I was 16. The thought of staying home all day, in a city where I don't know anyone is a bit overwhelming. I wonder about my parenting skills. Will I be good at raising kids? Because, let's be honest, up til this point I've had a lot of help. My children have spent the majority of most days in someone else's care. Now that they are going to be 100% my responsibility everyday, I can only hope I don't mess them up! We are truly "up-rooting" our little family and sticking it right smack in the middle of everything new. We are very accustomed to having a large family support system just up the street, or right across town. As of June, our closest family will be on the other side of the very large state of Texas. I can't help but wonder what God has to show me over the course of the next year. What I want to say is, "Really, God! It wasn't enough to have us go through the process of major heart surgery on our soon-to-be 4 year-old daughter, but we also need to do it completely removed from all that is safe and familiar to us?" BUT...I refuse to let it beat me. I will not give in to fear, or uncertainty, or frustration. I know that the bigger the challenge placed in front of us, the bigger the opportunity for God to truly do some amazing things in our lives. So, hopefully, 2012 will be the year of new hearts...not only for Kemarah, but for all of us as we witness the amazing works of God and grow closer to HIM.
